Acceptance, denial and the losing of marbles

'You are my sunshine' badge

We're working in partnership with Gallery Oldham developing the use of memory boxes for reminiscence amongst older people, including people with a dementia diagnosis.


March 13, Oldham

Philip writes:

Let's not pussyfoot, dementia can bring terror and anger and bitterness among many other calling cards. The work we're doing with memory isn't a panacea for those things, we're not doctors, but we are a distraction. Rather than allowing participants in one of our groups to enter a negative mindset, we can help to short-circuit the blues and the fury – sometimes.

This day in Oldham gives examples of both situations and how we dealt with them. Thematically we were dealing with the subject of pubs and the social life around them, but we were also dealing with participants' very particular needs.

Our first session regularly includes two people who have a dementia diagnosis. One of them is perfectly aware of this and will 'own' the illness, talk about it, and try to negotiate around it. The other person is in denial of what's happening, has a tendency towards anger. The two are chalk and cheese as they say and often fight. We only recently found out about the unspoken dementia - and it therefore took us some time to realise that there's possibly an underlying issue. Dementia is the elephant in the room and like any unresolved issue it causes tension. It's a tricky situation and one that we've so far defused by using the creative activities and conversation. We've also had after-workshop discussions with all concerned. However it's possible that we'll have to ask the aggressor to leave the group. Our duty is always to make sure that we run a 'safe place to play' and occasionally this needs reinforcing with firmness. But for now distraction is working fine.

The other session is with a group of six to eight people, most with a diagnosis of dementia/s, at varying stages. This group have generally been a very 'up' session for us. Although there are tremendous difficulties for some participants to overcome, there are also two key advantages - acceptance and very importantly humour. Laughing can't solve complex problems in itself, but it helps to de-stress a situation and in doing so we all move on. These sessions use a higher mix of game-playing than we'd usually employ (singing, playing marbles, etc.) but the play also quite evidently brings delight. Interestingly, here is also the venue where the deepest political discussion takes place – one of the participants is very hard left, another is a war refugee and others are ex-mill-workers with no illusions about their position in society. This isn't a rosy-glow gathering, but it is a fascinating, funny, damn good time.

The game of marbles we played there brought particular delight. It was a small riot. Marble skills of 80-plus years were employed. Particular hilarity ensued when the staff had to dodge the little glass balls of peril. There was perhaps an element of revenge in the joke, but most of all laughter that was shared equitably.

EXERCISES

1. Look at some examples of beer mats, bottle tops, etc. Invite participants to draw their own bottle top or favourite drink. Perhaps the drink might incorporate their own name and a famous slogan (eg. Alfred, probably the best grandpa in the world. Gladys is good for you, etc.) Make the composition circular and it can become a badge.


2. Word association game. This is an excellent way of getting a discussion going, or stimulate ideas for writing. Our discussion this time was themed around pubs and the word used are listed below. We often use pairs of opposites so that the game is more intriguing.


Pub/teetotal


barmaid/mother


a tot/saspirilla


landlord/Salvation Army


pork scratchings/apple pie


tavern/show me the way to go home

Reet's glass of Babycham

put your gong on

My last day in St Helens with the project 'text from grandma' was very productive and informative. The  morning was spent at Mayfield Care Home, with the group of regular attendees. As ever there was a constant flow of reminiscence, that was in turn selected from to create one-off badges. The shaky handwriting, the accidental splatters, they soon become miniature works of art.

I started the session with the theme of accessories, Vinny soon inspired a change in the conversation with his memory 'had my brothers wrist watch, hidden it away when he went in the army.' This flowed into a conversation about military medals, and war time memories. 

Norman's badge, ink pen and pencil. 

'The Military Medal the MM, for being a daft fellow, doing something daft. I got mine in the Middle East, 20 and daft enough, got carried away. You wouldn’t do what you would normally do. Was brought up in the Bluecoat School, so more or less ready for the army. Put your ‘gong’ on, that’s what we used to say.

I was totally blind, enough to frighten me, they flew me to Israel, famous hospital for taking blind people. Was looked after by Suzie Baxter (funny the things you remember) A bomb to close blinded me. Playing soldiers.

I was in Berlin at the end of the war. In my tank, an American tank, the ‘Stuart Tank’ was very good if you like that kind of thing. Alright till you were in battle then it was different. It was normally quite comfortable, but frightened you often. You had to get stuck in. Was brought up in the Bluecoat, semi military anyway, it made a difference what school you went to.' Ernie

Norman

'The most significant part of the war, landed early morning on D Day, landed on the beach, quite exciting. Came day light, 6.30 in the morning, that was it, D Day. They told us about it, to keep quiet about it. Was in the Royal Artillery, that was it. Got called up, conscripted, told to go. Posted to the Far East when I was in Germany, spent the last 6 months in the camp. A tropical place, always hungry, best years of my life' Norman

Ernie's badges, name, initials and MM/MC award. Ink pen on paper.

Cherry Tree Nov 28

Around the table in an old nightingale ward people are face-to-face - it's a relief to be gathered in a group rather than moving from bed to bed as we tend to in the modern wards.

It's a remarkable and charming group - the lady sitting next to me has lost her sight in the last two years but has great equanimity ("I try to accept what's given with good grace") - another lady waiting for a cancer operation is nervous and brittle - an older man quiet, tremulous with war memories - a woman drooped in semi-sleep comes alive with the conversation, and another and another...

(1920s: at school as a child eating an apple, surrounded by other children so hungry that they are waiting for the core to eat.)

We talk about the time they are in now, at the end of their days and the time they grew up in amidst war and poverty but with a remembered sense of community - Lois and I jotting down their observations - there's a consensus among the group that many feel lost in this time and useless - where is there a place for all this experience? - I tell them about 'other societies' - what a catch all - where older people are considered to be in the last phase of their lives and it is their function to reflect on what they have lived - this is their contribution to society - this is what I've read though have not witnessed for myself, so can't vouch for the truth.

What's surely true is that it's an indictment of our own place and age that we do not have the ability to receive this wisdom from our elders, even less value it - but still, in this long room they sit full of treasure.

workshop feedback

I was lucky enough to work with Violet Gamble again last Friday on the pilot for 'Patience', we met her on our first day at Stepping Hill, at the beginning of October. She wrote her thoughts about being in hospital onto paper, which we made into badges for her (and other patients) Although clearly in a lot of discomfort she welcomed us warmly and clearly recalled the session and the effect it had on her:


people like you make life interesting, to have someone to talk to, are you making badges? That was a funny day, a fun day, a big surprise, it was such a surprise- didn’t know what you where going to do with that big box. Very interesting- all very interesting. We where so proud of ourselves, we wore them all day, then wore them the next day, wore them until they changed my nighty, then put them by my bed, until I sent them home.

Its so rewarding to hear such feedback, especially after so long after the actual workshop.

Photo © Lois Blackburn 2008

sculptural badges

27th June and 4th July

The last couple of weeks at the Y Zone in Radcliffe we've been working with students from Riverside school to create text/art badges. Using photocopying, drawing and writing the young people created ‘one-off’ artworks, about identity and their vision of sculpture. We viewed the work they have created so far and a collection of sculptures to inspire: Christo, Andy Goldsworthy, David Mach, Claes Oldenburg, George Wyllie and Richard Long.

The young people re-created classical sculptural poses, such as Rodin’s ‘The Kiss’, covering themselves with their badges, and photographing themselves in mirrored backdrops. As ever their energy was enormous, and resulting text/art/sculpture fantastic.

For more examples please go to www.flickr.com/photos/arthur-and-martha/